This is how I am feeling this month.
Spread too thin and rather overwhelmed.
And what else? Like I’m not getting to do the stuff I really want to be doing, or really should be doing. One of them being writing – the blog has been quiet for a while. Not because I haven’t written anything down. I have about ten started posts, but all need to be re-read, edited, images sourced, keywords used, headings and sub-headings decided on, ‘wow’ Google-friendly subject lines thought up… this is why none of them are finished and posted online yet.
Three times this past week, whilst I was lying in bed with one of my toddlers, trying to get them to fall asleep, but trying to keep myself awake, I thought of ideas. I jotted them down, and that’s as far as I got. It’s not easy working full time and raising two little munchkins who need so much time and attention that I’m really struggling to give them. Remember that mommy guilt I mentioned previously? It’s worse when under-slept and overworked. So what to do? I can feel I’m in a rut, it happens to all of us. How to get out of it…
I have no magic formula sadly.
If I did, I would share it with you for sure!
What a day today was!
My day today started with me getting up at 5am to catch up on some work, prepare for a meeting and clear some of the seven email inboxes I manage either for myself or my clients. I don’t like getting up early, I feel tired since 2013, but the house is so nice and quiet in the mornings. It’s peaceful and the day is laid out with so many opportunities and options. Things feel new, the birds sound cheerful and I feel all-conquering. Time seems almost endless at 5am. I will get so much done today I tell myself. I think I even smirk a little. I’ve got it sorted, I’m just so organised…
At about 5:07am I realise that my main email box, the one running my VA business emails is not working. No connection, just a pop-up telling me to ‘login’. And do you think that I can? Nope, I try every password I have ever used for Outlook. I think I even make some up, because I’m getting so confused. I start WhatsApping my poor husband to tell him I can’t work, even though he is still sleeping soundly. I know, but I had to vent to someone (and I did also message my IT guy for help, not that he would be awake either at that hour). Anyway, to cut a long story short I didn’t properly get back online till about 10:45am this morning. At a few times during the process of getting my Outlook to work again, I thought I might actually go a little crazy from anxiety. My plan for the day was out the proverbial window and I didn’t have a plan B.
I decided at some point that I couldn’t waste time. People were depending on me, waiting for me. I had to get stuff done. So I started working on other things that were less important for today, but needed to happen at some point this week. I could have gone back to bed, or thrown a temper tantrum – I see them often in my house, so I know exactly what one needs to do to get a reaction. But how would any of that have helped my day or my stress. So instead, I got to cross a couple of smaller items off of my To Do list and now I will work late tonight, but at least I can work again. Always try to find the silver lining in something, no matter what, it will help with your sanity.
So what do we take away from this?
No matter what we do, any of us, whether a stay at home mom, corporate director, entrepreneur or a working mommy… we can plan and organise and do as much as we want, but we can never foresee a disruption of this kind. The thing about disruptions is how we react to them, how we work around them, how we pick ourselves up and carry on again.
Tomorrow I plan to get a lot more done and then have an awesome weekend.
I haven’t taken a full weekend in weeks and I reckon this is another reason why the cracks are starting to show. Without work life balance certain aspects will always start to suffer and only we can make the choice to choose what we make time for each day.
Easier said than done I know. I am still trying to start exercising since having my second child in 2015, but it’s on my mind and I will start one of these days! Soon!
Thank you to my husband for being so patient with me
and Happy Thursday everyone!
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